Common Relationship Truths to Unlearn: A Psychotherapist Suggests


Our idea of ​​relationships borrows heavily from the books we read, the people we interact with, and the movies we watch. While some of us grew up watching love stories end in tragedy, some think it’s the most beautiful feeling in the world that stays with you forever, barring all obstacles and stereotypes. As we grow up, our notions of relationships, love and the idea of ​​accepting the other in all their truth also change. We learn to navigate life with all it has to offer, and in the middle we also learn to make the necessary changes in our adult relationships for our comfort. As we learn to do the same, we are also fed many ideas of how relationships should be. But the truth is, the truth in a relationship varies with people.

READ ALSO: How to Apologize: A Psychologist’s Complete Guide

Psychotherapist Emily H Sanders has noted the four universal truths of a relationship that we are taught that are important not to learn. They are the following:

Share everything without filters: Sharing everything, being honest and transparent with the partner is an absolute necessity in a relationship. However, not being filtered may not be a good idea. Being compassionate and considering the partner’s trigger points and pain points while sharing things can help in the relationship.

Zero conflict: Conflicts are a natural sign. Two people in a relationship are meant to disagree at times and go through conflict. Volatility is not a good sign and partners must learn to accept each other’s opinions.

Love is always passionate: The initial phase of the relationship is filled with enthusiasm. As soon as the infatuation wanes, the passion also tends to wane. However, that doesn’t mean the love has faded. Love feels like calm after a while.

Apologizing is a sign of loss: Apologizing or acknowledging mistakes builds trust, love, and strength in the relationship. Apologizing does not mean giving up the power of the relationship.


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